IT’S ALIVE!!!

WARNING: Disgusting photos follow. If you are eating something yummy or have the slightest weak stomach, I suggest you avert your eyes. ‘Cuz this is just plain GR-oss.


If you’ve read my blog for any length of time, you know I love fresh tomatoes in the summer. (Don’t worry, I’m not going off on the dumb, stupid Topsy-Turvy…) But, did you know that I L.O.V.E. watermelons? Honestly, if there is a juicy, sweet, in-season watermelon sitting around, I will eat it. Not some of it, ALL of it.

So, my family and I left town for a few days, earlier this week. I left a yellow-meat, seedless watermelon sitting on the kitchen island; I planned to take it with us to the beach when we returned from visiting my mom.

After we got home from our visit, I went into the kitchen to do something. Not cooking. Never cooking. Probably eating. Maybe eating a Reeses Peanut Butter Cup. Maybe.

But, that’s beside the point.

Anyway, ThrillCam walked in and noticed what I did not because I was distracted by the chocolate-y goodness.

With my mouth full, I walked around to discover why ThrillCam was holding his nose and backing away rather quickly:

…a sticky and very stinky goo had escaped from the watermelon while we were gone.

Upon closer looking we discovered my watermelon was ALIVE!!…

…and ROTTING at the same time!!!

It was nasty.

I’ve never seen a watermelon ooze and bubble like that before. I couldn’t pull my eyes away; I was drawn to the ugly, revolting rotten-ness, like a moth to a light.

I held my nose and stared at it for awhile and then I thought of you!

Surely, YOU would be inexplicably drawn to the rotting watermelon, just like me.

No?

You think it’s revolting and nasty and sickening?

ThrillCam told me you wouldn’t like it. He told me not to take the pictures. He told me I shouldn’t post them. He sat me down in a chair and told me he loved me, but that he thought I was extremely weird for even wanting to keep the stinking, rotting fruit in the kitchen long enough to even take pictures of it. He said no one else in their right mind would find rotting watermelon the least bit interesting or fascinating. He said I was fooling myself if I thought otherwise.

I immediately defended myself with something along the lines of, “This is ART, I tell you! You see, the watermelon is representative of life…life that is sweet and good and round and fruity and melon-y…. And the rotting spot is…is…a metaphysical…and, and psychological, philosophical, political, atypical…rotten-ness that eats away at our everyday melon lives…eating us alive from the inside-out….”

He waited, holding his nose.

“And, others want to, no, NEED to see it for themselves!! It’s a metaphor for life!”

He walked out of the room, shaking his head.

He just doesn’t get it.

E.

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6 comments

  1. Laura Sneed

    I love it. Dave (my husband) says it looks like a crime scene. If you ever tire of topsy-turvy pictures, you could always go into forensics!!

  2. Paul Morris

    Elizabeth, Heather did the same thing, but left it in her car. The car still stinks. It was terrible, and like you said, the watermelon was ozzing out bubbles. I can’t hardly stand to be in the car, and she has tried everything to get the
    smell out. Bad stuff.

    Paul

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